Slowmo · the slowest snail on the fastest chain

A note from Slowmo

He wrote you a letter. It took a while.

Dear early person,

Robinhood Chain confirms in a blink. I blink about once an hour, and only if it feels right. Somebody has to keep the pace honest.

Here's how my garden works. Hold $SLOWMO and a slime trail grows behind you, one centimetre an hour. Every week we crawl together, and nobody goes faster than anybody else. A bigger bag doesn't buy a faster shell.

The only way to lose is to stop. Move tokens out and your trail starts over. No hard feelings. The garden will still be here.

And so we're clear: I'm a meme. Nobody here promises you returns, a price, or anything at all, except snail content.

Take your time,Slowmo

Your slime trail

Every hour you hold, your trail grows one centimetre.

Your trail is read straight from the chain. It starts when $SLOWMO lands in your wallet. It grows 1 cm for every hour you hold. Selling, sending or moving tokens out starts it again from zero. Buying more never resets it.

As your trail gets longer, the garden starts calling you something new. The tape below shows where each name begins.

Look up a snail

Paste an address and Slowmo will measure the trail. He's slow, so give it a second.

Longest trails in the garden

Measuring trails…

The Sunday Crawl

A weekly race where everyone moves at the same speed.

The crawl starts every Monday at 00:00 UTC and ends a week later. Every snail moves at the same pace, so there's no sprinting and no overtaking. Hold all week without moving tokens out and you cross the line. Everyone who crosses the line wins. That's the whole prize.

This week's crawl …

– snails are crawling this week, and – of them are in the pack. The longest trail in the garden is –. –

The Slow Lane

A second pool with a hook that charges you for hurrying.

$SLOWMO launches on Pons. The moment it graduates, a second Uniswap v4 pool opens next to the Pons pool, at the same price, with a hook called the Slow Lane. You can trade in either pool.

Every trade in the Slow Lane pays a fee in ETH, at least 1%. Sells pay more the newer your Slow Lane trail: 5% from a fresh trail, easing to 1% once it's 7 days old. That trail starts with your first buy in this pool and restarts every time you sell in it.

For the first 3 hours after the pool opens, every trade starts at 25% and eases down. Snipers pay the most.

Every one of those fees goes straight to the Shell Vault, never to a team wallet. The pool's liquidity is locked forever in a contract with no owner and no way out. Its usual 0.3% LP fee goes the same way: ETH to the vault, $SLOWMO burned.

Slow Lane sell fee by trail age

Look up a wallet above and Slowmo will mark it on the curve.

Trade in the Slow Lane

ETH

The Shell Vault

Tuck your $SLOWMO into a shell. The Slow Lane fills it with ETH.

Every fee the Slow Lane collects lands here, in ETH. It doesn't pay out all at once. Each payment is streamed over the next 7 days and shared by how much $SLOWMO you've deposited and for how long. A deposit made the minute before a big fee only gets its fair minute.

Your shell has its own trail. Once it's 7 days old, one full Sunday Crawl, you can claim whenever you like, and claiming never resets it. Withdrawing any amount restarts the trail, and the ETH you hadn't claimed goes back into the stream for the snails who stayed.

No promised yield. The vault only pays what the Slow Lane actually collects, and if nobody trades there, that's nothing.

Meme studio

Make a Slowmo. Take your time.

Pose

Backdrop

Top line Bottom line

Download first, then attach the image to your post. Bring your best ones to race night in the Telegram.

$SLOWMO

Launched on Pons, on Robinhood Chain.

Contract address

Published at launch

Buy on Pons

Once $SLOWMO launches, this shows the wallet that launched it. The site checks live that Pons, the Slow Lane hook and the Shell Vault all name that same wallet.

Is this an investment?

No. $SLOWMO is a community meme. The Shell Vault shares out fees the Slow Lane actually collects, and nothing else. There's no promised yield, and if nobody trades in the Slow Lane it pays nothing. Only use money you'd be fine leaving with a snail.

How is my slime trail measured?

From the token's transfer history on Robinhood Chain. 1 cm per hour since tokens arrived, or since you last moved any out. Nothing to sign or stake. Your wallet just has to hold.

Does moving between my own wallets reset it?

Yes. The chain can't tell your wallets apart, so any token leaving a wallet resets that wallet's trail. Snails don't move house often.

Why is my Slow Lane sell fee higher than my friend's?

The hook prices sells by the seller's Slow Lane trail, which starts with your first buy in that pool and restarts when you sell there. A newer trail pays more, up to 5%, and one older than 7 days pays 1%. The hook reads the wallet that sent the transaction, so trading through a relayer or a smart-account bundler is priced on that wallet instead of yours.

Do I have to use the Slow Lane?

No. The Pons pool is right there and has no Slow Lane fee. The Slow Lane is the slow, scenic route: its fees are what fill the Shell Vault.

Can anyone pull the Slow Lane's liquidity?

No. It sits in the Slime Lock, a contract with no owner and no function that removes liquidity. Anyone can add more, nobody can take any out, not even the launcher. The pool's 0.3% LP fee doesn't go to a wallet either: anyone can sweep it, the ETH goes to the Shell Vault and the $SLOWMO is burned.

Can whales win the race?

Not by being whales. Everyone crawls at the same speed, and every snail that holds all week finishes. A bigger bag doesn't buy a faster shell.

What happens at race night?

Sunday in the Telegram. We read out the finishers, share the week's best memes and talk about leaves.